


"They said we wouldn't amount to anything"

by Croatoanvirus2014



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, M/M, tw: self-harm
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-09
Updated: 2014-12-09
Packaged: 2018-02-28 17:39:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,251
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2741273
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Croatoanvirus2014/pseuds/Croatoanvirus2014
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>So the preview for Season 2 Episode 7 came out and Jasper said the line "they said we wouldn't amount to anything" so of course I had to write a sad fanfic based off of this line. It gets happier towards the end. Also, trigger warning for self-harm</p>
            </blockquote>





	"They said we wouldn't amount to anything"

“You wouldn’t amount to anything.” Those words had haunted Monty and Jasper their whole lives. It had been repeated to them so many times they had lost track, but there were a few times they remembered exactly why it was said to them.

            They had just entered their first day of middle school. Jasper was holding on to Monty’s hand since he was nervous, and Monty didn’t mind. They had been best friends for three years now, and they didn’t plan on that changing anytime soon. Some kid that Monty presumed was an eighth grader walked up to them and started to laugh at them. Jasper’s eyes started to water and Monty gave them mean glares. “You won’t amount to anything. You two are so gay you can’t even function right.” Monty pulled Jasper closer and they ran into the bathroom before they started sobbing. Monty calmed him down and walked him to his homeroom, giving him a pat on the back before heading off to his. That was when he learned that any feelings he had towards guys were supposed to be hidden, and that if he had any romantic feelings towards guys, he was worthless, and somehow a failure. Though this was one of the more memorable times, it certainly wasn’t the only.

            He had failed two tests in a row. It wasn’t that he didn’t understand the material; it was just that he couldn’t remember it. Jasper knew that if he studied, that he was supposed to get it, and he wasn’t supposed to be failing tests. Eighth grade wasn’t going the greatest for him, but when he kept getting low grades on tests, his teachers started pulling him aside and asking him if anything was wrong.

            “I just can’t remember anything. Like, I understand it when you’re teaching it, and I make sure to study every few nights, but I just, I can’t remember,” he tried to explain. All of the teachers he told this gave him a sympathetic look besides one.

            “If you keep these grades, you won’t amount to anything.” Jasper felt a lump in his throat beginning to rise, but kept himself from crying until he called Monty on the phone later that night. He listened to Jasper and told him that everything would be okay eventually, even if things sucked right now. Jasper went to bed that night crying, and Monty was worried about his friend for the next few weeks, until his grades miraculously started rising up again.

            Freshman year of high school was a rough one for Monty, but sadly, he remembered it all too well. He was nervous as is, what with moving up into a bigger school and all. He expected to be made fun of a little bit, and he was prepared to handle it. He had survived middle school, after all, and he had been teased nonstop since the teachers did nothing to stop it and he couldn’t figure out how to stand up for himself. The one time he tried to, he had gotten made fun of even more, and he had learned it was better to just shut up and stay silent, even if he knew that wasn’t the right thing to do. Freshman year it got worse. The second he walked in he had been called a “fag” and told he was stupid. He tried to not take it personally, but it kept getting harder to do week after week. Eventually, he broke. Though he knew it was the worst possible solution, he broke out a blade from a pencil sharpener and ran it across his wrist, barely breaking the skin. As a few beads of blood began to form, he told himself “you won’t amount to anything.” He covered it up with bracelets the next day, hoping nobody would notice.

            Spring time freshman year Jasper started to smoke weed, trying to get away from the world he lived in. He didn’t want to die, but he didn’t want to face his problems either, so he tried to escape them. He didn’t develop an addiction or anything, but he started to grow dependent on it. He tried to quit smoking it, but it was a hard habit to break. Jasper started stealing a few dollars from his mom to get some, and realized that he had messed up, but he couldn’t stop now. His mom found out, and told him he wouldn’t amount to anything. The next few weeks were torture as he was coming off of his high that he had been living in for weeks. Luckily, Monty was next to him the whole time, and he even helped Jasper stay caught up on his homework because he kept avoiding it. It put some more stress on Monty, but he knew he could take it somehow.

            Junior year of high school was the absolute worst. Monty had overloaded on difficult classes, and Jasper had done the same. Both of them found out that it was nearly impossible to see each other with how much homework was piled on, but in good news they shared a lot of classes since they had picked out almost all the same ones. That was some of the only good news that year. Both of them were breaking down due to the pressure, and Monty’s parents had ignored him ever since he told them that he was homoromantic and asexual.

            “That’s not even real!” His dad laughed. Monty hid from them, not wanting to hear what they had to say anymore. He fell back on the only thing that he knew how to do, and he harmed himself on multiple occasions throughout the year, making sure to hide it well. Monty hadn’t even told Jasper about it. He was too ashamed. They both kept falling behind on work, and when neither of them got one A on their report card, they thought they wouldn’t amount to anything. Though both of them felt the same way, they never told each other how much stress they were under. It had been reinforced that feeling stressed out and pressured was “unmanly”, and as much as they both said they hated the social norm, they still fell victim to it.

            Things finally started looking up for once. Monty had confessed that he had a crush on Jasper for a while, and Jasper said that he felt the same way. Monty decided that when he was eighteen he would live with Jasper’s parents. They were a bit more accepting, and he finally felt like he had found his home. One night, Monty had told Jasper everything about his past, including his history of self-harm. They both ended up crying that night, but Jasper reassured him that this didn’t change anything between them, and that he still loved him. Monty kept crying, only this time it was out of happiness. On graduation day, they both got their high school diplomas and gave each other a huge hug. Three years later they got the keys to their first house, and when they walked in they both started laughing for the same reason.

            “It’s funny. All these people told us we wouldn’t amount to anything. But you know what? We made it,” Monty said. Jasper grinned and gave Monty a quick kiss before they started unpacking their things. They realized that it didn’t matter what people told them, because they were important, and they had become so much more than what people had seen in them.


End file.
